What is Love: A Guide on How to Give and Receive Love

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Lorainne
Feb 18, 2020

The Types of Love

The concept of love has always been complex, a web of mixed meanings that are both familiar yet distinct. Love can pertain to the idea of loving someone in a romantic way, usually the subject of love poems, even haikus . There is also the idea of loving oneself, as well as loving a parent and a best friend. Love also exists through compassion for others, and can also come in the form of fleeting feelings. Love can also be about caring for the environment. The idea of saying you “love” a certain material thing is different from saying “I love you” to a significant other, but how it works remains similar. 

The Types of Love

The Types of Love

Oddly enough, the word “love” somehow encompasses everything mentioned above. Society has defined it for centuries, developing various types and degrees through nuances, experiences, and connotations. In contrast, however, ancient Greek philosophers have made such an abstract concept more concrete, broken down into categories. According to them, there are seven types of love. In celebration of the month of love, here are the types of love:

Eros: The love for body

This pertains to sexual attraction, which is merely characterized by physical desire towards others. It is usually accompanied by a lack of self-control, which is why it is associated with passion and fleetingness. Because of this, relationships built solely on Eros tend to disintegrate quickly. 

Philia: The affectionate love

This love accounts for the love you feel for your family and close friends. Philia goes hand in hand with trust, loyalty, and companionship. It usually thrives on mutual bonds and similar experiences, which is the reason why Greek philosophers believed that Philia is an equal love.

Storge: Love for the child

This pertains to the unconditional love parents have for their children, defined by acceptance, sacrifice, and approval. Storge then helps a child develop through security, attachment, and encouragement. Here in the world, Storge can be seen through not only kind and loving words and gestures, but also ensuring a  good educational system for the child. 

Agape: The selfless love

Agape is universal love. This type of love can be seen through a person’s love for other humans, nature, and a higher being. It manifests through intuition, spirituality, meditation, and even nature. It can be expressed through care and charity for others. In real life, it can be expressed through looking for  ways to save the environment.

Ludus: The playful love

Ludus pertains to playful love, characterized heavily by seduction, flirtation, and sex. It is usually evident during the beginning of a relationship, usually still full of play and excitement. As the subject of many tragic books and  written essays, Ludus remains to be all-powerful in the modern world. 

Pragma: The everlasting love

Pragma thrives in couples who have been loving each other for a long period of time. It develops throughout the years, characterized by balance and synchronization. Pragma will only continue to survive through much needed nurturing and maintenance.

Philautia: Self-love

Philautia is connected to a sense of self-worth and confidence, which Greek philosophers believed to be necessary for finding a sense of purpose. Too much self-love, however, can lead to narcissistic behaviors and arrogance. The perfect balance of Philautia, on the other hand, can help us learn how to love others through self-acceptance. Philatua here can simply mean taking care of yourself, mentally and physically. Taking care of your mental health could be one, as with finding better dorm meals.

The Five Love Languages

Love Languages

Understanding the different kinds of love means you also have to know the different ways to express it. In 1992, there was a concept promoted by Gary Chapman in his book about love languages, and it is an idea that is still being thrown around and developed to fit modern times. Each person has specific love languages they employ, and it is another person’s duty to understand their own love language along with their partner, friends, and family’s love language in order to feel loved.

There are five love languages. It is believed that there can only be one love language for a person, however, it is more complex than that. One person’s love language differs from how they choose to give and receive love. Essentially, a person can have two love languages if they have different means of giving love and how they want to receive love. It may change over time as you develop more of your personality and get exposed to different people.

Words of affirmation

This love language occurs when you use words to express your appreciation towards your partner in order to build them up and encourage them. It doesn’t have to be a poem or prose. Verbal compliments are the easiest to give and it is most effective when it’s simple and short, but sincere. When you have a partner that receives words of affirmation well, then make sure you’re careful with the words you throw at them because they will surely take them to heart. 

Acts of service

This love language expresses itself through actions or by doing things you know your partner or loved one will appreciate. You perform actions like do the laundry, rub your partner’s feet, make the bed, and other tasks with the thought of your partner’s happiness and love in mind. Acts of service are more appreciated by partners if it’s done under no obligation or without a negative tone. 

Receiving/giving gifts

Gifts are a way to let your partner know how much you appreciate them. These don’t necessarily have to be expensive gifts. Often times, your partner will appreciate a small gift if it means it’s something you remembered about them or made exclusively for them, like a 3-stanza poem. It can be as simple as buying them food after a long day or buying a shirt you think will fit them well. 

Quality time

This love language requires a lot of dedication to your partner. This means you will have to offer time and attention to your partner as you talk about your day or whatever you want to discuss with them. Quality time comforts your partner and reassures them that you love them at the end of the day. If you cancel or postpone a planned dinner or activity with them they will definitely feel hurt. It is essential that you know how to manage your time well and schedule your dates and quality time accordingly. 

Physical touch

Physical touch can help a person feel safe in the presence of their partner. This love language can merely be holding hands, kissing, and hugging, however, it doesn’t have to be in public. A person with this love language may feel they are most loved when they feel the physical presence of their partner within close proximity, meaning they appreciate it more if you keep them close as much as possible. 

Writing assistance for college students

Often, being a college student means no time for other relationships. Those who take their studies too seriously will dismiss every chance they get to find love at the time of their life where they are most vulnerable to it. If found with the right person, love can be a passage to many good experiences you simply won’t get while studying. Luckily, there are services for college students available to help them study, and at the same time go on a quest for love. Among those services is CustomEssayMeister. We have expert writers in different professions that can accommodate your needs. If you need someone to write an essay, term paper, research paper, or any other academic paper for you, then send us your order and we’ll have a writer for you in no time. College is a time of exploration, so let us carry the weight of academic pressures along with you as you attempt to discover love. 

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