I Want A Husband

I was dating this women for about six months when she told me she had a surprise

for me at her house. I had no idea as to what it could be. When I got there she had this

child. She told me that he was from her last relationship and that things didn't work out as

expected. This was the last thing I would have expected. I stood there thinking to myself

"She expects me to take care of this other guy's kid". I didn't know what to say. She had

kept this from me for six months. Did she figure "If he falls in love with me it won't

matter". I thought to myself, "I, too, would like a husband". Why do I want a husband?

I want a husband who will take care of all my needs, a husband who will pay for

me to further my education. A husband who will take care of all my housing costs not to

mention provide auto and health insurance for me as well. My husband will also buy me

top of the line clothing, (even if I don't need them). A nice expensive life insurance policy

is also a must since I will have to maintain my current lifestyle should he happen to pass

away. My husband must also have a decent paying job so I can live comfortably. He must

also provide me with a nice car so I will be able to get myself from place to place.

I want a husband who will keep up with the outside of the house. He will have to

mow the lawn weekly as well as trim the hedges. He must also paint the house when I feel

it's necessary or pay to have it painted. I want a husband who will clean the gutters in the

spring and shovel the snow in the winter. He must also not forget that the leaves have to

be raked in the fall when the trees turn. When my fancy car breaks down my husband will

have to be a fairly capable mechanic in order to fix it or find someone who is.

My husband will also protect me with his life should someone happen to break into

the house. He will also prepare meals for the family or help me prepare them when I've

had a long day. When the trash in the kitchen is full he has to take it out and put it in the

garage until trash pickup day. He must also take care of the kids when I deem necessary.

If a diaper needs to be changed he'd better be willing to help. When I go and buy a nice

new painting of flowers to hang on our bedroom wall he has to hang it up. When my

husband comes home from a long day at work and changes his clothes the dirty ones

better be placed into the laundry basket and not on the floor.

I want a husband who will make plans for my vacation when I am in need of one as

well as any party plans that need to be made for us. I want a husband who knows that I

need at least two nights a week out of the house with my friends. He must also be able to

accompany me out for a night on the town after he is done with work even if he is tired.

My husband must also help me find a suitable baby-sitter for our children should we need

one as well as take care of the arrangements for summer camp for our children.

My husband must also be able to satisfy each and every one of my sexual needs.

My husband will make love to me when I want him to not just when he's in the mood. He

must also assume complete responsibility for birth control. If he wants to make love to me

he'd better satisfy me. He must also be attentive to me before and after we make love, and

if he wants to make love he better have planned a nice romantic dinner for the two of us.

Most importantly though he will remain faithful to me or else.

I expect all of these things from my husband and more. If he is unable to perform

all of these duties in and around the house then he is not fit to be my husband. One must

remember that this is what I was brought up to expect from my husband and I will except

no less.