Essay, Research Paper: What About Family

What happened to Family?
Domestic violence can most thoroughly be described by the National Coalition against Domestic Violence . Their definition states domestic violence is any form of physical, sexual or emotional abuse, which takes place within the context of a close relationship (national domestic hotline). In most cases the relationship will be between partners living with each other and the abuser is usually male and the abused female. But, contrary to popular belief, domestic violence does occur in forms of men being battered, children, elderly, and even in gay and lesbian relationships. As in any social or scientific problem in order for one to find a solution, the most logical place to explore would be the root of that dilemma. That introduces the big question, when and where is domestic violence introduced and exposed to us?
Domestic violence, beyond a doubt, was seen as entertainment in early literature. In the book Othello, one of Shakespeare's great plays --which every American who goes through high school is almost certain to read-- the main character is so overwhelmed by his jealousy and suspicion of his wife's infidelity that not only did he verbally abuse her, but he ultimately ends up killing her by suffocating her. In this example the medium is literature. Though maybe intended for pure entertainment, it still makes domestic violence seem as an acceptable alternative and was something of an amplifier advertising such violent acts.
Children should truly be the main focus when trying to decipher this Domestic violence genome code . It s almost a question of which came first the chicken or the egg ? Did the child learn this behavior on its own, or did it retain this behavior from observing the actions of its parents. Developing minds, particularly in children from the ages of 4 to 5 years and through puberty, form lasting mental models that embody understanding of what the world is about, how it works, and what is normal and permissible behavior. The clarity of these models is a function of the degree of exposure (media violence). This unquestionably supports the idea that this phenomenon is learned. The most logical defense against this learned exposure would be to spare children from viewing or even hearing their parent s violent physical disputes. It s safe enough to say that Marriages aren t flawless i.e. the honorable Bill and the first lady Hillary Clinton, but when dragging children into the ordeal parents run the danger of potentially scarring kids socially and psychologically.
Viewing violence in the home can also be in the form of television watching. This goes back to what was discussed earlier entertainment . What s the sense of letting your young children watch movies such as What s love got to do with it? and Stepfather ? What it all boils down to is the parents --though not always doing what s best themselves-- making sure their misbehavior or bad habits don t infect and negatively affect their children.
There s no place like home. Wrong! Children spend almost more time at School than at home, so if mom and dad aren t slugging it out there could be some bully at school introducing such violent behaviors. Everyone remembers the school bullies; a report by Bonny Campbell - Breaking the silence on domestic Violence - states that School bullying, if it is not nipped in the bud , can lead to date abuse and later domestic violence. The school bully when he is dating a girlfriend resorts to what he knows best being abusive. He may feel it is right to treat his partner in this way, and he is so forceful that the girls believe that they share the blame " (Campbell B.). The nature of this problem is one that fathers usually used to- talk to their sons about. But we must not forget that we live in a day in age where in most families the father position is forfeit. Maybe just as schools have recently made it a priority to focus on sex education, we might also need to focus on Domestic violence education. The habits of the playground, which involve control and forcing their will on others, can lead later to bullies battering their girlfriends or partners, and putting their children at risk. Through being raised in an abusive household, the children then run the risk of becoming batterers and bullies themselves when they grow up (Mental Models). Just as it s was supposed to be the job of parents to teach children about the birds and the bees which is now taken over by schools, maybe schools should teach relationship skills.
It really seems like we re asking a lot of Schools, but as times change it seems parallel that the role of the parent has changed. It used to be the father s responsibility to teach their sons chivalrous manners, a.k.a. social skills, and how to communicate with the opposite sex. Now it seems as if the child is out to fend for itself, mimicking what s said on television or searching the Internet for pick up lines and date tips. Searching for a solution to Domestic Violence is somewhat of a circle. Starting off at the family structure, if children weren t exposed to it in the home, if they were taught morals that goes along with it in the home, maybe future generations won t have the same problems in the home.